Dazzles Me So

and the waiting, 

the waiting

for the world which

I long for, 

goes on

almost without end.

I sit through hours

upon hours of people

pushing around small

bundles of words,

ideas, concepts, products,

stuff, machinations, and

even the care of people

in order to leave behind

their mark on this tiny 

world - their jobs - this earth

and their own personal

universes in an attempt

to feel as if they are not only 

alive, but meaningful as well.

A grand spray of urine

across the shoes of time.

I was here.

I was vital.

I meant something.

I was more than here.

I was so, so vital. 

I really, really meant something.

I think I would rather fish. 

Take to the trail-with these 

crippled legs-and set out among 

the twigs and towering oaks.

to say to myself, I am nothing.

My small steps disturbed 

only a few piles of leaves. 

The fish I caught had no 

names and were of no certain size.

Only beautiful. Yes, that's it. 

the fish were beautiful. 

The people, the family, 

the friends, the coworkers,

they were beautiful.

The places and the moments 

were ineffably beautiful. And, 

all that beauty planted itself 

in me. And, all that beauty was 

somehow the only real thing.

The subtle static state of all 

life pulse with an awesome 

beauty and that dazzles me so.

And lay hidden a punctuating 

presence in the silence.

The great silence.